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ISBN10: 0071840842 | ISBN13: 9780071840842
ISBN10: 0071840842
ISBN13: 9780071840842
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From hurting to healing . . . resistance torecovery . . . struggle to strength . . . This can be your story When your parents, friends, or partner tell you what you should or should not do to "get better," do you think, "They just don't get it"? Melissa Groman gets it. As a therapist, she has spent twenty-five years helping young women who binge, starve, and physically harm themselves to heal and recover. In Better Is Not So Far Away, she combines her experience, wisdom, and compassion to help you see beyond your behavior, discover who you really are, and decide to change your life. You might know that obsession, disordered eating, and self-harm won't ultimately make you feel better--but you haven't been able to stop. Bridging the gap between what you feel and what you do, Groman explores raw emotional pain with a deep knowledge of the human psyche, including stories of those who have suffered, faced, and conquered self-destructive urges. "A life well-lived means more than just a lessening of symptoms," Groman writes. "It means a true shift in how you think and how you tend to your own feelings and thefeelings of others." Dealing with family, friendships, emotions, and life itself--as well as food and body issues--can be complex and can get in the way of even wanting to recover. When you clear away some of the emotional obstacles, it's easier to take practical steps to genuine reliefand healing. This book will help you do just that. It can be the first or next right step toward facing yourgreatest hurts and challenges in a practical, profoundly honest, and self-caring way. A healthy, happy lifemay seem impossible now--but, truly, it is not so far away.
Better Is Not So Far Away
Introduction: Landing on Life
Are You Asking?
This Is Not a “How to Recover” Book
A Word about Therapy
Part One: Hurting
1. Inside Emotional Pain
The Deep End of Despair
Tired All the Time
Killing the Pain
The Edge of the Ledge (Where Does It Stop?)
2. Alone in the Woods
Your Angry Heart
When You Feel Worthless, Pitiful, and Lonely
You Can Find Self-Worth
Fear and “What If I’m Empty Inside?”
Good Grief
3. If You’ve Been Hurt or Abused
4. Who Are You?
You Are Not Nothing. Really.
Don’t Tell Me I’m Not Cold
Whose Fault Is This?
Get Out of My Food and My Money—I Think
Great Expectations
Still a Kid
Part Two: Healing
5. Maybe I Don’t Want to Recover
Seriously Stuck and Stubborn
Gathering Your Personal Truths
Imagine If
Why Am I Here?
The Great Wait Debate Decisions, Decisions)
Drop Your Weapons
6. Finding the Willingness
Rebel with a Cause
Okay, I’m Listening
Functioning Fine, Thanks
Please Don’t Talk to Me about Feelings
Except for Me
Cooks in the Kitchen
Call Me George
Helping Your Helpers
7. Who Are Your Real Friends?
Choosing Between Sharing Razors and Jelly on Your Toast
So Who Needs Friends Anyway?
Making It Happen
Skinnier Than You
8. Parenting Your Parents
They, Too, Have a Story
Surviving the Storms
New Words and New Ways
9. A Separate Peace
Who Are These People?
Moving Out
So It Must Be Me
Part Three: Tools for Life
10. A Wise and Gentle Mind
At the Intersection of Emotional Pain and Recovery
Meeting Your Self
Back Talk
Clappers in the Closet
You Need Credit and Encouragement
Your Side of the Street
Mean
11. Mind Trek
Besties in Your Head
Vermont
12. Tell Your Story
Talk
Revenge Alternatives
Write On
Color Your World
Move It
13. The Heart of Our Matter
Vacation Days
Do Your Work
Your Personal Creed
Protectzia
Gratitudes and Victories
Nourish Yourself and Others
Boot Camp
Sitting Still
Part Four: A Better Place to Be
14. Good God, Really?
When You Feel Huge
But List
Prayer
15. Everlasting Starting Points
Fish Is Fish
Forgiveness
Self-Forgiveness
16. Hope Forward
Taking Fun SeriouslyRelapse, Retrauma, and Remembering
Passionate about LifeComfortable in Your SkinResources
Index
Comfortable in Your SkinResources
Index
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